Left in the Desert

Love is to open sky

As loathing is to hell

How easily and swiftly

One can turn into another

One moment we are holding hands

The next I’m crying

Your cruel words

Cutting me,

Tearing me into pieces

You didn’t think twice

Before telling me all the lies

Was any of it true?

My heart was your toy

Never caring if you broke it

Because you already had another

I was naive to trust you

Thinking you wouldn’t do to me

What I watched you do to her

Promises broken

You took everything from me

Knowing you had everything

You left me in the desert

Without water

Not caring if I made it out

Here I am

ALIVE

With the strength

You never cared to see

I hope when you see me now

You fill with regret

Feeling the hell you tried to bring on me

The fire never reaching me

While depths of hell consumes you

My fate is left to the open sky

With all of the possibilities

That I possess now

I am free

The burden of you is gone

Letting me breath in the fresh air

Exhilarating me

© Christie Cote

February 9, 2011

Morning Sunlight

Morning sunlight ripples across the rivers surface

A picture perfect moment

That goes unnoticed

Everyone is in a hurry

Never taking a moment

To take in the beauty

We take these things for granted

Not thinking that someday these luxuries may not be here

What if morning came without sun?

Then will we stop and notice?

Taking time to hear the bird’s story

That he sings to us each morning

Instead of hitting the snooze

Open yourself to the world outside

Appreciate what is waiting outside the door

© Christie Cote

January 23, 2011

Fate

This game you play

Is very dangerous

Like jumping out of a plane

Forgetting your parachute

You act innocent

Like an angel

From above

Pure and fragile

Guess again

Your act only works on a crowd

I’m not part of it

I see you for who you are

Stripping away the mask

That fools everyone else

You start a war

When I’m winning

You retreat 

Finding higher authority

Hiding behind them

Like I’m the one

Who committed treason

Harming one of my own

You didn’t expect me to fight back

When you first attacked

Sorry to disappoint you

I’m not defeated

Just like that

You may have begun this war

Trying to take an advantage over me

Despair will only fall on you

I will finish first

every time

I fight for victory

Never backing down

Think again

Before throwing punches my way

If you choose to anyways

Finish what you started 

You can’t hide

Just because things

Don’t go your way

In the end you will pay

Eventually your body

Will crash to the ground

With nothing there to stop you

But the last feeling

Of branches

Causing you every bit of pain

You inflicted on me

All because you played dangerously

Leaving behind your parachute

Fate claims you

© Christie Cote

October 26, 2010

To the mean girl(s) in my past. You know who you are! I always Persevere.

Scars

The scars that mark me

Can’t be seen

They wrap themselves around

A fragile part of me

Where I feel every one

Some start out small

Even unnoticeable

Until they grow

Not being able to ignore

The pain that is really there

It was hidden for so long

The appearance hits me hard

Taking my breath away

Somehow my heart still beats

With the scars that cover it

This heart once unmarked

Is a canvas for scars

They seem to spread

Like a burning fire

That can’t be put out

I feel each one

Like I’m touching the flame

The burning starts out subtle

Then becomes unbearable

To lose this pain

I must reconcile

The mistake I made

So long ago

I can’t hide

The pain I feel inside

It is too strong

To hold onto

Without losing hope

Happiness so far away

My heart wont be content

Until certain scars are healed

© Christie Cote

September 30,2010

Distant Memory

Tears spill down my face

I just can't get away

This pain

So real, so deep

Consumes my heart

Who do you think you are?

Winning me

The prize you sought

Then throwing me away

Like a worthless souvenir

You picked up along the way

I looked for the good

That I thought I saw

Giving you a chance

To hold my heart

Instead you crushed it

Without a care

Stripping the mask you held

Finding the cold heart

Hidden beneath

Don't have feelings

I don't care to stay

This game you play

Won't touch me

Soon you will see

How strong I can be

Soon you will be

Like a distant memory

A beautiful rose

With thorns that pierced me

The wounds heal

As if it never happened

It will be

As if you don't exist

©Christie cote

October 21, 2010

For Adair Doe

The Beauty Of The Sun

When the sun sets

It's a beauty of

All the memories

You have...

And when the world goes dark

Things seem impossible...

But don't give up

The Sun will rise once again

© Christie Cote

December 6, 2005

Looking Back

Today I find myself

Looking back

Thinking about how it should have been

Regrets are spread across the past

Trading in people who mattered

For one unforgiving mistake

Wanting to go back

Choosing the other path

Life has found its way

To where I am today

This person I have become

Is who I want to be

Both roads would have lead to here and now

Unfortunately the path I followed

Left behind the people

Who mattered most 

My heart feels the loss

I clearly still care

After all this time

I have the memories stored

And the thoughts of the ones that could have been

I can never get back

What I lost

Part of me hoping they understand

Disappointment in myself

For going against

Everything I was

Turning into a robot

Who couldn’t make choices

Or let my own voice be heard

When I went down that path

I became programmed

Stuck until I overrode it

Finding my voice again

Knowing I wasn’t the only one

Who got hurt in the process

Part of my life was taken away

A part I will never get back

My heart

Will always bare the scar

That will have the memories underneath

No matter where life takes me

I will always remember

© Christie Cote

August 4, 2010